tollie.org/blog

I confess that I have neglected this blog and its small audience. Mainly, it’s just annoying to me personally that I don’t find time to update this as I would like to. I have so many things on my mind that I’d like to share - tech things, personal things, lifeguarding things, and even some news things. But alas, they remain thoughts trapped in my mind as I find myself with little time designated for my blogging.

I wish I had the energy to write here for hours and that I could do so guilt-free, but neither are true. Instead, I’m updating my blog while taking a personal pause to praise my God and enjoy the truthyness of some my favorite songs. In this latest go-around of my blog, I’ve held off on publishing these sorts of entries, but I suppose this entry will be marginally more enjoyable to see at the top of my blog than the “Don’t use Enom for hosting” entry beneath it. (PS. I still don’t recommend Enom. I’m now using Godaddy and so far I’m satisfied. Powweb comes in a strong 2nd place for hosting providers that I, personally, have tried.)

As for the guilt-free - I certainly do have a lot of work to do, but I can’t work every single hour of the day. I have to take some personal time to reflect on these truths, and blogging about it is only helping me to reflect. So here’s the plan for this post: a friend of mine just got back from leading worship at a camp, but we come from different denominational backgrounds and he hasn’t heard _some_ of the songs that lyrically are pillars of the doctrine I believe to be true. I’m burning him a CD (if this gets me sued by the RIAA, so be it - they’re out of control, I respect the artists and this is free marketing for them, not stealing - besides its on one of those “Music” CD-Rs, you know, the ones where the price is higher because they pay the RIAA a royalty for calling them a “Music” CD… which in Canada the courts have ruled, makes mix CDs completely legal) and I think I’d like to comment on some of the songs on the playlist, here, as I decide what order to put them in.

1) “Lead of Love” by Caedmon’s Call. My life’s song; the song my friends know is a must for my funeral one day. I could expound upon every line (but I’ll just choose a few here). “Looking back at the road so far, it sure has left its share of scars, mostly from leaving the narrow and strait.” Oh how true. I’ve messed up more than I care to think. But “Looking back it is clear to me, a man is more than the sum of his deeds, and how you’ve made good of this mess I’ve made is a profound mystery.” “Looking back I can finally see, failures bring humilty… helps me see my need for thee.” “Looking back I see the lead of Love.”

2) “To Ever Live Without You” by Jody McBrayer. Not incredibly strong lyrically, but a song that means a lot to me as we performed it as a traveling ministry group. One piece from the song, however, is strong enough both in music and lyrics that it was my ring tone for years. “No greater love has no one than this, that he would lay his life down for his friends! It was all about a man - it was all about a cross - it was all about the blood that was shed so I would NOT be lost - it was all about the love that was bigger than a life - it was all about the freedom that was given through your sacrifice.”

3) “Come Thou Fount.” A lyrical hymn that sings some amazing truth, even if it’s not the easiest to understand. “Jesus sought me when [I was] a stranger wondering from the fold of God. He, to rescue me from danger, interposed his precious blood.” “[I am] prone to wonder, Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love. Here’s my heart Lord, take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above.” ”

4) “It is well with my soul.” I’m not really a fan of the tune of this song, and frankly, the chorus becomes too repetitive for me. But I can relate to the author as he’s singing literally to his soul, as if to say “Soul, listen up, you will be OK, so let’s praise!” (It is tempting here to insert some commentary on Pullman’s “His Dark Materials” and the daemons there, as it relates really well, but I shall not.) And of course, I rejoice with the truths this song presents as is builds up to the moment we Christians look forward to: “and Lord haste the day when my faith shall be sight - the clouds be rolled back like a scroll - the trumpet shall sound and the Lord shall descent praise the Lord! Praise the Lord! O, my soul.”

5) “All Because of This” by Mercy Me. A quick song answering the questions of “Why do we do the things we do? How can we sing when there seems no reason to? How can we smile when there’s not much to smile about?” and answers it so simply: “It’s all because of this - we’ve tasted love, we’ve tasted hope, and tasted holiness.”

6) “Tears of the Saints” by Leeland. I wrote a human video to this song. I see it in my head when I listen. I wrote it because Leeland’s lyrics here quickly paint small snapshops of some of the situations that I envision Christ caring so deeply about, but that I feel the Church has left largely unhelped and ignored. I pray I’ll have the strength to do what Christ would do, especially when it’s inconvenient and unpopular. “There are many prodigal sons, on our city streets they run, searching for shelter” (Please note here: prodigal sons = Christians, thus he’s pointing out something that is sadly too true - when someone messes up, often the church fails to help them back into the fold of God’s love and instead they gossip about what it is that makes them “prodigal”) “And there are homes broken down - people’s hopes have fallen to the ground from failures.” (I picture financial burdens here. Family’s honestly trying, but their debt and mistakes have added up so greatly they’re not seeing the light at the end of the tunnel - and it emotionally devastates them.) “This is an emergency.” And this beautiful scene here as it gets painted by Leeland - “Sinner, reach out your hands - Children in Christ you stand — and sinner, reach out your hands [God will pick you up, and as] Children in Christ you stand.”

7) “Run” by indie band After the Chase. A simply song I wanted to include mainly for its standout-ness as indie, but it also alludes back to a verse from Isaiah that was the “life verse” of my first youth minister, who taught me so much. “I want to soar on wings like eagles - You will renew my strength” “I want to follow your purpose until my legs carry me no more.”

8) “Cry Out Your Name” by John Sherrill band. I know these guys, and was working the conference where they recorded this live CD. They’re genuine. This song has a brilliant chorus, beautifully defining why and how we cry out His name. “Lord I worship you. And I cry out your name, that’s why I’m created - that’s why _I’m_ created - and I cry out your name, as I sign to the ones who don’t believe - and I cry out your name, so the rock’s will be silent - the rock’s will be silent - and I cry out your name unashamed!”

9) “Holy Holy Holy” continued from the above, since it was recorded live. This song actually reminds me of the funny fact that the Bible never mentioned the word “trinity” - it’s just taught as truth. Funny how God never got around to defining the exact word we had to use to describe his unique plurality; I guess he’s not a legalist. :)

10) “Before there was time” by Caedmon’s Call. “Before there was time, there visions in your mind - there was death in the fall of mankind, but there was life in salvation’s design. Before there were days, there were nights I could not see your face, but the night couldn’t keep my grace and you came and you took my place.” … as God is apart from time, his plan for my life was true, is true, and will be true from t = negative infinity to t = positive infinity.

11) “There’s Only One (Holy One) by Cademon’s Call. Oh how I love Caedmon’s lyrics that musically pack huge punches of truth into each verse. This song certainly does, and I can’t help but quote it in bulk:

Left His seamless robe behind
Woke up in a stable and cried
Lived and died and rose again
Savior for a guilty land

It’s a story like a children’s tune
It’s grown familiar as the moon
So now I ride my camel high
I’m aiming for the needle’s eye

I chased the wind, but I chased in vain
I chased the earth, it would not sustain

…

(And here, I think it’s a very nice mixing decision to bring in the drums hard and heavy here to emphasize the “war” - as it’s a personal spiritual war we are fighting)

Lord, You are my Prince of Peace
But this war brings me to my knees
See, there’s a table You’ve prepared
And all my enemies are there
But where my Shepherd leads
Where else can I go?
Who else fills my cup ’til it overflows?
…
There’s only One who never fails
To beckon the morning light
There’s only One who sets loose the gales
And ties the trees down tight
To the Solid Rock I fly
Though He bids me come and die
There’s only One, only One Holy One

12) “Wedding Dress” by Derek Webb. Another lyrical giant of a song here, even if the lyrics got it pulled from many stores for it’s biblical use of the word “whore.” Basically, Derek paints a picture here that I know oh too well - a believer who outwardly says he will follow Christ, but for we often “cheat” on Christ for stupid, petty, worthless reasons compared to the matchless blood of Christ. “I am a whore, I do confess, I put you on just like a wedding dress, and I run down the aisle.” Then with “Cause money can not buy a husband’s jealous eye, when you have knowingly deceived his wife” he warns those who may be deceiving the church, living sinfully, with perhaps special attention to those who donate large sums of cash and feel pridefully as if they’ve done something ‘just so great’.

13) “In Christ Alone.” Very simple, but very powerful lyrical truths are what make this song stand out as such a great song to worship with. “In Christ alone, who took on flesh, fulness of God in helpless babe - this gift of love and righteousness, scorned by the ones he came to save. ‘Til on that cross, as Jesus died, the wrath of God was satisfied, for every sin on Him was laid - here in the death of Christ I live.” But thank God the story does not end. “There in the ground, his body lay, light of the world by darkness slain, then bursting forth in glorious day, up from the grave he rose again! As as he stands in victory, sin’s curse has lost its grip on me. For I am his, and he is mine, bought with the precious blood of Christ.” (I love this musical break they take, as if giving time to reflect on the amazing truth of the last lyrics). And then to reassure the believer that salvation does not come from ourself but it come from God, and God’s promised he won’t allow anything or anyone to take it away, because to deny a believer salvation would be to deny himself, as he lives within us. “No guilt in life, nor fear in death - this is the power of Christ in me - from life’s first cry to final breath, Jesus command’s my destiny - No power of hell, nor scheme of man, can ever pluck me from his hand - ‘Til he returns or calls me home, here in the power of Christ I’ll stand.” … Ps. Mysteriously, and without any explanation anywhere that I’m able to find, there is a dog bark very faintly heard at 0:36.

14) “Be Thou My Vision” - a hymn to God that asks God to be God of our lives - go figure. “Be thou my wisdom and thou my true word - I ever with thee, and thou with me, Lord. … thou in me dwelling, and I with thee - one.”

15) “My Jesus” by Todd Agnew. Another song that challenges me personally to live radically and makes me a little bit angry at the stereotypical Christian church. “‘Cause my Jesus bled and died - he spent his time with thieves and sluts and liars - he loved the poor and accosted the arrogant[/rich/comfortable], so which one do you want to be? … Blessed are the poor in spirit, but do we pray to be blessed with wealth of this land?” “If Jesus was here, would you walk right by on the other side, or fall down and worship at his holy feet?” “Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church - the blood and dirt on his feet might stain the carpet - but he reaches the hurting and despises the proud, and I think he’d prefer Beale St. street to the stained glass crowd… Wanna be like my Jesus!”

16) “Our God Reigns” by Delirious. This song talks about abortion, (”40 million babies lost to God’s great orphanage”), HIV and violence in Africa, as well how little it costs it would cost each of us to help: (”100 million faces staring at the sky, wondering if this HIV will ever pass them by. The devil stole the rain, and hope trickles down the plug, but still my Chinese take away could pay for someone’s drugs.”) It talks about war, (”The west has found a gun, and it’s loaded with unsure.”), the ridiculousness of a culture that spends millions on vanity and ‘doctors’ wasting their intelligence on these surgeries, (”Nip and tuck if you have bucks, in a race to find the cure.”) and it reminds us that despite it all, “Our God reigns - forever your Kingdom reigns… for there is only one true God” and it directs us to do something! - at very least we can pray: “forgive us all, forgive us please - as we fight for this broken world on our knees!”

17) Lastly, “Thankful” by Caedmon’s Call. Another Caedmon’s song with some scriptural truths in the lyrics that make it possible to truthfully say the very unusual tag line from the chorus: “I’m so thankful, that I’m incapable of doing any good on my own.” Because of scriptural truths like these: “Cause we’re all still-born and dead in our transgressions. We’re shackled up to the sin we hold so dear. So what part can I play in the work of redemption if can’t refuse but I can not add a thing? ‘Cause I am just like Lazarus and I can hear your voice - I stand and rub my eyes and walk to you, because I have no choice… so I am thankful, that I’m incapable of doing any good on my own [because good comes from God, and it's God who saves us, not ourselves]. “It’s by grace I have been saved, through faith that’s not my own, it is a gift of God and not by works, lest anyone should boast.”

Entry in progress - incomplete and forgive the formatting and grammar, etc.

As a student in junior high school, nothing affected my technological future more than the ACTE (Alabama Council for Technology in Education) computer competition. Oh, the fun times of Team Programming. I remember (and they’d admit this is true, and not just my version of events) one year sitting in the room, alone with my teammates, myself coding away in QBASIC while they jumped from desk to desk, throwing erasers and making animal like noises. That was regionals, and I believe we won that year. Other years, we usually were in a gym or other open area - just spaced apart from the other teams, and so less it was less crazy.

Many years later, it was my honor and pleasure to be allowed to judge the regional and state ACTE competitions, and to be invited back for this year’s competition as well. Now, with another ACTE on the way and without any special qualifications to do so, I’m writing my thoughts on the future of the competition.

Where we are now…

Currently the categories are as follows:

• Information Technology Test
• Multimedia
• Computer Programming
• Video Production
• General Applications
• Webpage Design
• Hardware: Robotics
• Team Programming Challenge (Group Only)

Last year at the State ACTE, judging Webpage Design, me and my partner judge had a problem.

First, we had this one girl who came from the technology school and who was learning PHP in her 9th grade (I believe?) class. She had written a database interface script that worked quite well. It was clearly her own work, written in notepad, building off what she had been taught and she presented it well. But this was not a page that you’d browse to and visit - it was the workhorse beneath it. By our rubrics, which explicitly called for graphics, with audio, video, or visual effects, we simply had to dock a good deal of points from the overall score, despite feeling like she had roughly accomplished what she set out to do and recognizing that this sort of website programming is definitely applicable to real world design.

Next, we had a team project where two artistic girls from the county school had designed an extensive personal page, putting together what amounted to their own personal portal page for them and their friends who were interested in their genre of art. The site was coded in Microsoft FrontPage and although they were very familiar with FrontPage’s workings and the FTP client they used to publish to their webserver, they had little knowledge of the HTML code being generated. They too were able to present their site well, with clarity, and a great enthusiasm for their work. But we felt understanding the code was critical, and the site was a little bit disorganized and inconsistent.

What we had was a case of two competitors in the same category, with completely different types of entries. And we felt that both had done well at achieving their goals and both goals had real-world value.

Fortunately for us, the rubrics allowed us one category of pure “impression” points and without deliberately setting out to make their scores the same, our impression points amounted to creating a tie, which was perfectly fine by the rules, and an outcome that we felt was fair and appropriate.

Lastly, we had a group that had done exceptional work. They were using Notepad and Photoshop, creating XHTML compliant code with gradient faded headers and sidebars. So their project was in yet a third category. Neither pure scripting like PHP, nor very rich on actual content (at least, not as much as the two artistic girls), but they clearly demonstrated a full competency with HTML/CSS design and website organization and function.

Futher, with the real world migrating their applications off of the desktop and onto the internet, it’s soon inevitable that students will soon be (if not already) submitting applications running off of an internet platform, rather than Microsoft’s Windows. So are they General Applications or Websites? For the moment, let’s say they’re General Applications. As other applications are judged on criteria that include the interface, so must internet applications, which means that they will be held responsible for their knowledge of HTML as well.

Category complications will continue when websites using video podcasts become ubiquitous, and become even more confusing when a custom script is the hallmark of the website’s video playback or organization system.

With all these overlaps, you might think the rules allowed for one project’s entry into multiple categories, but this is not the case. If a person or group had fully produced a video podcast, coded the HTML/CSS/RSS for the site, and included a widget that can be run as an Application on the Facebook platform, they would be forced into only one category, effectively punishing them for their completeness, although this sort of project is the kind of advanced, real-world production we should be strongly encouraging.

Where Should We Go?…

It seems to me that the obvious direction for the ACTE is to catch up to the modern movement now taking hold in software development - platform independence and cloud based computing. The internet is no longer the dealership where we browse for our vehicles (applications); it is now more fundamental - it is the road on which they drive. I believe that nothing short of a complete overhaul of the majority of categories will allow the ACTE to remain true to its goal, by promoting real-world production.

What should this category re-structuring look like? I propose we put the categories into super-categories of Design, Programming, and Literacy allowing contestants to enter each projects in up to ONE design category and up to ONE programming category.

• Design
  • Applications (judging only the functional interface, content, layout, etc; not the back-end code)
  • Internet Sites (same as above + created images, ie. HTML, CSS, basic javascripts, etc.)
  • Video Production (judging only the video and it’s production value, not the context in which it appears)
  • Overall Best Design (not sure this would be a good idea, but science fairs are able to determine an overall winner from across all their categories)
• Programming
  • Applications (judging only the back-end code of Internet Applications and General Applications. from Visual Basic to Facebook Platform scripts, from C++ to Ruby on Rails running a MySQL database. See my notes below on why I think this is the most important of benefactor from the updated categories)
  • Hardware (judging the code that works the devices, with some points alloted for the devices design, however, this is not the focus)
  • Team Programming (level 3, 4, 5; as always)
  • Overall Best Programming (same as best design - not sure it’s a good idea, but science fairs pull it off.)
• Literacy
  • Computer Literacy Test (all levels)
  • Computer Skills Test (Level 1 and 2 only - to replace General Applications and to complement Team Programming. Instead of Team Programming questions, students will be given practical tasks to accomplish (eg. Create a Microsoft Word document, format it such and such, adjust it so and so… and then two or three more questions, with the resulting files saved and submitted via similar methods to team programming). This would be held during the same time block given to Team Programming.

So here’s the story. If you’ve followed my tweets you probably noticed that I- A, am a Harry Potter fan, and B, recently bought the 5th DVD, Order of the Phoenix but didn’t get the “Special Edition” two disc version. It was a mistake on my part, not immediately finding it in Wal-Mart and foolishly assuming (hey, I was in a hurry) that the special features had be relegated to the HD version only in some bizarre marketing move. After all, stranger things have happened.

And as was kindly pointed out to me on my Facebook wall, I was wrong. As always, there was a 2-disc version somewhere floating around; I just missed it. So with my receipt in hand I went back to Wal-Mart knowing that technically I wanted to exchange one DVD product for another and that technically violated their return policy, however, I hoped that common sense would prevail and that a manager somewhere would recognize that the product I was returning (the plain-ol’ movie) was included in the new product I wanted to exchange it for - just the new one had more stuff (for only $3 more).

Thankfully, and perhaps surprisingly today, the common sense ruled and the manager recognized the situation and agreed to the exchange. Interestingly they said they had to open the DVD there, however. At first I thought “to check the discs to make sure they’re the same?” but then it dawned on me - they were ensuring that I couldn’t return the new DVD for cash by saying it was unopened. I’m guessing this is standard operating procedure, but it struck me as surprisingly - again - as a simple common sense approach.

Here, I was originally going to write about how I also discovered that Wal-Mart has finally updated their security on product returns, based on some advise I gave them 3 years ago. OK, so they probably didn’t do it because I told them, but they did adopt a policy to plug a considerable security hole that allowed customers to steal almost any item they wanted for practically nothing, and that I pointed out 3 years ago. More on this next time.

Now, I’m going to rant. And sue Warner Brothers. Ok, maybe not but oooh, am I ticked.

Finally, with Harry Potter 5 DVD #2 - the bonus features in hand, anxious to see the deleted scenes, the audio commentary, and whatever else is there that I paid my $3 for… I load the disc into my Macbook, and viola, it loads and starts playing that awesome score! Oh, sorry. That’s not what happened. I meant… and boom! it KERNEL PANICS my Macbook. Yes, kernel panic… that Mac equivalent of a blue screen of death… the “sorry, your computer is dead, you must restart” message that I haven’t seen since I first installed my Airport Extreme card into my Powerbook some 4 years ago and it was a little loose.

In other words: I have never had a Mac “blue screen” on me except for those times when it was caused by my incomplete installation of a wireless card. Once I fixed that, 4 years later, I’ve still never seen one. … Until today, when I insert the HP5 DVD, and DVD Player tries to fire up.

I highly suspect this to be related to the Windows only nature of the DRM surrounding the “bonus” digital version. I didn’t care anything about the digital only version, because it was for Windows only. And because I already had a copy of the movie from the internet. (Ok, now I really can’t sue Warner Brothers; but hey, I bought a copy regardless, right? Yeah. Learn from this studios: piracy doesn’t hurt your sales like you want to think it does. It’s more like FREE PUBLICITY… anyways, moving on…)

So I don’t know if any data was corrupted, and of course I’ve now set DVD player to not open/start playing a DVD on insert, but you can better believe I won’t be inserting this DVD into my Macbook again until I’ve taken some time to Google this and see if others experienced the same result.

OK WB? Do you get it? digital copy = good. DRM = bad… Bad guys can EASILY get around it (bit torrent? newsgroups?), good guys only hindered by it, my Macbook- probably kernel panicked by it.

Backtrace terminated-invalid frame pointer 0xbfffd4a8
Kernel loadable modules in backtrace (with dependencies):
com.apple.driver.AppleIntelGMAX3100(5.1.8)@0×70a000->0×7c2fff
dependency: com.apple.iokit.IONDRVSupport(1.5)@0×6fc000
dependency: com.apple.iokit.IOPCIFamily(2.4)@0×60d000
dependency: com.apple.iokit.IOGraphicsFamily(1.5)@0×621000

BSD process name corresponding to current thread: DVD Player

Update: I’ve calmed down a bit and I confess, it could be completely unrelated to the DRM and more related to the fact it was the DVD players first launch on this computer, or perhaps something to do with the full screen playing. None the less, I stand by my original comments on DRM.